It came out of nowhere! All of a sudden Ruqi’s thumb found
it’s way to her mouth. Not as a baby, but at the age of two and a half.
To say it came completely out of nowhere would be slightly
unfair to my darling little girl. In one year, she faced several major transitions:
relocation, put in daycare and then abruptly taken out, emotional ups and downs
of mommy’s pregnancy finally ending with the introduction of the “new baby” , weaned
off of breast, potty training, and let’s see, am I leaving anything out?
So, needless to say, she went through a lot emotionally and
physically. With the new baby on board, I could not coddle her every time she
was upset and I could not always sing and rock her to sleep. As a baby, suckling the breast was her – and my-
answer to everything. Whether she was hungry, hurt, or saddened, suckling was
always her greatest comfort and medicine. Weaning her at twenty months when I
became pregnant was difficult to say the least.
In retrospect, I realize that breastfeeding her through
every emotional and physical strain as a baby set me up for our present
struggle: thumb-sucking. I hate it. The sound is like nails on a chalk board as
far as I’m concerned. The sight of it is not only unappealing, but attracts
looks and comments from other adults.
I must admit, when she first started sucking her thumb, I
was relieved. She was never a self-soother, but she had now become one out of necessity.
I was so busy with her baby sister, that it was a relief when she would suck
her thumb to sleep or to stop crying. I actually believe it was a blessing and
a mercy for the both of us. However, as most things during toddlerhood
eventually do, I believe it has run its course.
Yesterday I bought these really pretty Dora Band-Aids. With
an excited expression on my face I said, “Ruqi, look at your thumb! It has a
boo boo!” She inspected the red blister that has formed on top of her thumb
from vigorous sucking. “What do you
think we should do?” I desperately needed the band aide idea to come out of her
mouth, not mine.
“Dora Band Aide Mommy!” Thank God! I was so happy she agreed
to the bandaging of her little swollen red thumb. Before she could think too hard
about it, I wrapped the bandage around and snapped a pic. It worked pretty well
all day, but when nightfall came she cried for her thumb and I was too
exhausted to fight, so I removed the bandage. But tonight there was a breakthrough!
I put another bandage on– with her permission- and got her to sleep with no
sucking.
With every milestone usually exists the two steps forward,
one step back rule. In addition to our normal routine of prayer and story
books, I also had to sing to her, rub her back, and stroke her hair until she
dosed off. But that’s okay; she’s only 3 years old after all. And if keeping
her away from that thumb means I have to be a bit more nurturing, then perhaps
that is a good thing too.
2 comments:
I have a good childhood friend, we caught up with one another recently. She said, "look what I still have" and it was her comforting pillow - her nickname is Linus. Yes she is over 40 and proud...lol
Yes, and it's perfectly normal to seek comfort, that's what we do as human beings. And honestly, I don't think she does it often enough to cause the tooth deformities, so maybe it was me giving into societal pressure, tired of hearing comments about it.
So, the update is that I didn't press her hard this morning when she wanted to suck her thumb, she was crying and looked so helpless :( Now lets pray she gives it up before 40! lol
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